Extreme Makeover Home EditionAn Ungodly Man/Husband – pt 2Message #9Intro:– This morning we looked at the 1st part of message #9 – an ungodly man. We saw some things that we should definitely avoid in our own lives. These should not be things that we are involved in. Here is a quick review of the things we should avoid as mentioned in Proverbs 6:6-19: * laziness * deceptive speech and actions 1) prideful/haughty eyes 2) a lying tongue 3) hands that shed innocent blood 4) a heart that devises wicked plans 5) feet that run rapidly to evil 6) a false witness who utters lies 7) one who spreads strife among brothers– God is communicating to us here in this passage that we must be living our lives in a way that is honoring to Him. If we are living for ourselves, being guided by whatever works for us at the moment, these things will begin to creep into our lives. According to God’s Word, these sins will bring destruction to our lives.– Tonight we are going to look at the 2nd part of message #9 – an ungodly man. We are going to see 5 Destructive Behaviors to Avoid in the message tonight. – In the history of mankind we see that people have always tried to improve upon what was done before them (thought not always successful). In the case of human behavior and morality people have also made attempts to become better people. Though this is a noble endeavor, it is misguided. People are attempting to become moral people, instead of godly people. They are attempting through their own knowledge and efforts, instead of through the enablement of the Holy Spirit. So tonight we are going to look at 5 of these destructive behaviors to avoid. 1) A bad temper> This is something that is a hindrance to a godly life. If someone is very easily offended they will not be able to be very effective for God. They will always be upset with someone else because someone hurt their feelings or bothered them, etc… Many times things are misunderstandings, or just no big deal. If we in essence take our ball and go home each time we don’t feel something went the way that we wanted it to, we are falling into Satan’s trap, not fulfilling God’s purposes for us as Christians. Sometimes we are way too overly sensitive. The following verses give us some evidence of the damage this kind of temper causes: – “A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, But the slow to anger calms a dispute.” Proverbs 15:18– “Like charcoal to hot embers and wood to fire, So is a contentious man to kindle strife.” Proverbs 26:21– “An angry man stirs up strife, And a hot-tempered man abounds in transgression.” Proverbs 29:22– “This you know, my beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God.” James 1:19-20 2) Foolishness> This error also brings great harm to the life of the individual, the family, and others. If someone is being led by their own wisdom, they are on a path that leads to heartache and destruction. A few things that keep us from becoming this kind of foolish man are: study God’s Word, be actively involved in a local church that teaches God’s Word and has other believers to help hold us accountable, and be in consistent prayer so that God can communicate to your about your spiritual condition. – The foolishness of man ruins his way, And his heart rages against the LORD.” Proverbs 19:3– The integrity of the upright will guide them, But the crookedness of the treacherous will destroy them.” Proverbs 11:3– They will pass through the land hard-pressed and famished, and it will turn out that when they are hungry, they will be enraged and curse their king and their God as they face upward.” Isaiah 8:21– “But immorality or any impurity or greed must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints; and there must be no filthiness and silly talk, or coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks.” Ephesians 5:3-4 3) A slanderer and a gossiper> “The utterance of false charges or accusations that defame another person’s reputation; when directed toward God, such accusations are considered blasphemy” Tyndale Bible Dictionary> “Includes the following things:a. Whispering. Ro 1:29; 2Co 12:20. b. Backbiting. Ro 1:30; 2Co 12:20. c. Evil surmising. 1Ti 6:4. d. Tale-bearing. Le 19:16. e. Babbling. Ec 10:11. f. Tattling. 1Ti 5:13. g. Evil speaking. Ps 41:5; 109:20. h. Defaming. Jer 20:10; 1Co 4:13. i. Bearing false witness. Ex 20:16; De 5:20; Lu 3:14. j. Judging charitably. Jas 4:11,12. k. Raising false reports. Ex 23:1. l. Repeating matters. Pr 17:9.” New Topical Textbook> TALEBEARING, SLANDER. “These words translate, in the OT, expressions implying secrecy (Pr. 18:8, ‘whisperer’), evil report (Nu. 14:36), the giving out (Ps. 50:20) or carrying (Pr. 11:13) of slander, or the (wrong) use of tongue (Ps. 101:5) or feet (2 Sa. 19:27). In the NT the words translate accusation (1 Tim. 3:11, diabolos), speaking against (2 Cor. 12:20; 1 Pet. 2:1, katalalia) or defaming (Rom. 3:8, blasphēmeō). All talebearing, whether false (cf. Mt. 5:11) or not (cf. Dn. 3:8), malicious (Ps. 31:13; Ezk. 22:9) or foolish (Pr. 10:18; cf. 18:8 = 26:22; Mt. 12:36), especially between neighbors (Je. 9:4) or brothers (Jas. 4:11), is condemned (Lv. 19:16) and punished (Ps. 101:5) by God, and causes quarrelling (Pr. 26:20). Slander springs from the heart (Mk. 7:22) of the natural man (Rom. 1:30), excludes from God’s presence (Ps. 15:3), and must be banished from the Christian community (2 Cor. 12:20; Eph. 4:31; Col. 3:8; 1 Pet. 2:1; cf. [of women] 1 Tim. 3:11; Tit. 2:3), which itself suffers slander (Mt. 5:11; cf. Rom. 3:8).” New Bible Dictionary> “EVIL SPEAKING may be defined as slander, calumny, defamation or deceit. This may be done by spreading false reports (Pr. 12:17; 14:5, 25) or by reporting truth maliciously, i.e. tale-bearing (Lv. 19:16; Pr. 26:20). Evil speaking is prohibited in Ps. 34:13; Pr. 24:28; Eph. 4:31; Jas. 4:11; 1 Pet. 3:10. It disqualifies a person from God’s favor (Ps. 15:3) and from office in the church (1 Tim. 3:8; Tit. 2:3). When a Christian is slandered he must patiently bear it (1 Pet. 3:9) even as Christ did (1 Pet. 2:23). The ninth commandment forbids false witness (Ex. 20:16; Dt. 5:20; cf. Ex. 23:1). To avoid the evil of false accusation more than one witness was required in courts of law (Nu. 35:30; Dt. 17:6; 19:15–21).” New Bible Dictionary > “talebearing, gossiping; it is closely connected to slander in the Bible, which condemns both. Lev. 19:15-16 lumps slander together with legal injustice and even false testimony in a capital case, but Proverbs uses the same word to condemn the talebearer and to warn the wise not to associate with gossips (11:13; 20:19). The nt also lists both as sins (Rom. 1:29-30).” Harper’s Bible Dictionary– “He who goes about as a slanderer reveals secrets, therefore do not associate with a gossip.” Proverbs 20:19 – “He who goes about as a talebearer reveals secrets, but he who is trustworthy conceals a matter.” Proverbs 11:13– “The one who guards his mouth preserves his life; the one who opens wide his lips comes to ruin.” Proverbs 13:3– “A fool’s mouth is his ruin, and his lips are the snare of his soul. Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” Proverbs 18:7,21– “He who guards his mouth and his tongue, Guards his soul from troubles.” Proverbs 21:23– “Like one who takes a dog by the ears is he who passes by and meddles with strife not belonging to him. Like a madman who throws Firebrands, arrows and death, so is the man who deceives his neighbor, And says, ‘Was I not joking?’” Proverbs 26:17-19– “For lack of wood the fire goes out, and where there is no whisperer, contention quiets down. The words of a whisperer are like dainty morsels, and they go down into the innermost parts of the body. A lying tongue hates those it crushes, and a flattering mouth works ruin.” Proverbs 26:20,22,28– “For we all stumble in many ways. If anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to bridle the whole body as well.” James 3:2– “Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.” Ephesians 4:29-32 4) Laziness> This is another error that will bring God’s judgment on a person. If a man is not willing to work the N.T. says, “if anyone is not willing to work, then he is not to eat, either.” 2 Thess 3:10. The following passages indicate that a lazy person will go to almost any length to avoid having to do hard work.– “The sluggard says, “There is a lion in the road! A lion is in the open square!” As the door turns on its hinges, so does the sluggard on his bed. The sluggard buries his hand in the dish; He is weary of bringing it to his mouth again. The sluggard is wiser in his own eyes than seven men who can give a discreet answer.” Proverbs 26:13-16 – “The sluggard says, ‘there is a lion outside; I will be killed in the streets!’”Proverbs 22:13– “Go to the ant, O sluggard, Observe her ways and be wise, which, having no chief, Officer or ruler, Prepares her food in the summer And gathers her provision in the harvest. How long will you lie down, O sluggard? When will you arise from your sleep? “A little sleep, a little slumber, A little folding of the hands to rest”– Your poverty will come in like a vagabond And your need like an armed man.” Proverbs 6:6-11– “The sluggard buries his hand in the dish, but will not even bring it back to his mouth.” Proverbs 19:24 5) Not home > This final error sounds a bit different than the first four, but it is just as dangerous. It is very dangerous for a man (or woman) to spend long periods of time away from home. There is something about not being in your normal environment that yields greater temptation (maybe because you are out of your element). Also, when you spend long periods of time away from your spouse and children it is easy to become emotionally/romantically attached to other people. This is especially a danger today, with so much busyness, long work hours, and long business trips. As believers we must trust God to provide a job that will enable us to be home with our families, they need us.– “Like a bird that wanders from her nest, so is a man who wanders from his home.” Proverbs 27:8– “Drink water from your own cistern and fresh water from your own well. Should your springs be dispersed abroad, Streams of water in the streets? Let them be yours alone and not for strangers with you. Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth. As a loving hind and a graceful doe, Let her breasts satisfy you at all times; Be exhilarated always with her love. For why should you, my son, be exhilarated with an adulteress and embrace the bosom of a foreigner?” Proverbs 5:15-20– “Keep your way far from her and do not go near the door of her house,” Proverbs 5:8– “To keep you from the evil woman, from the smooth tongue of the adulteress. Do not desire her beauty in your heart, nor let her capture you with her eyelids.” Proverbs 6:24-25– “Do not let your heart turn aside to her ways, do not stray into her paths.” Proverbs 7:25– “Do not enter the path of the wicked and do not proceed in the way of evil men. Avoid it, do not pass by it; Turn away from it and pass on.” Proverbs 4:14-15 Conclusion:– Tonight we looked at the 2nd part of message #9 – an ungodly man/husband. In the passages that we went over we saw that there were 5 Destructive Behaviors to Avoid.Here is a short review of them: 1) A bad temper 2) Foolishness 3) A slanderer and a gossiper 4) Laziness 5) Not home– These are behaviors that will lead to God’s judgment in our own lives as individuals, and they will also lead to the destruction of our families. These are things that as men (and women) we must give over to God and seek His help to not get caught up in these errors. We must also teach our children, grandchildren, and others to avoid these errors.– Come back next Sunday morning as we look at message #10 in our series Extreme Makeover Home Edition – Adultery. We are going to look at what the Word of God says about this sin and the destructive effects of it. We also will look at how to avoid it.